Walk: I don’t even know Joe but I can picture him laughing at the outcomes of who won each prize. Kind of funny!

Fly: Well, my dear, I know that you don’t think our friendships are bull. What if you were able to go visit her a week or two BEFORE the wedding to spend time with her? Or offer to be her executive helper the day of the wedding? I mean, we all know that’s what maids of honor are for but they aren’t always super stellar. This way you can spend time with her & share her special day. (Side note: I have a list as long as my arm of all the lovely ladies who I’ve met through here that I’d want at my wedding. Not sure if that’s crazy or what.) And no matter what, you know that we all understand where you are coming from, Cari included. You’re a fabulous friend to even consider going.

As for friends I consider some of the amazing people I’ve met through my blog to be among some of my best friends and I’ve never met them. (Hopefully that will be remedied before the end of the year though). As for your wedding, if you really want to go, I think you should go. Of if you could swing a trip after the wedding when you’ll have a whole weekend to catch up and have one on one time do that. You’ll figure out the best thing for you. =)

On Internet friends: I invited a couple of my mom’s Internet friends (who she had never met IRL) to my wedding. One couldn’t come because her daughter was in the hospital waiting for a heart transplant (daughter finally got one two months later and is doing very well!). The other is now my mom’s fiance. I wouldn’t discount the emotional connection you’ve made with people on the Internet.

Now the money aspect is a different issue. Even this stage in my financial life, I would drop big bucks to fly across the country for one of my best friends’ weddings. Unless it would put me in debt (or otherwise deplete necessary funds), not going wouldn’t be an option. For a distant relative or friend with whom I’m not close; I wouldn’t. I don’t have any bloggy friends so I can’t say where I would place them on that spectrum.

I know you’ll make the best decision for you.

Follow your heart love.

Walk: LOL at the prize heist you and Joe managed.

Fly: Wow… I’m sort of envious of the friendship between you and Cari. From my perspecitve I think it’s fabulous that you are both open enough to friendship and have become friends. As you said you won’t get a lot of time to talk to Cari at the wedding but I think you need to ask yourself are you going to regret it if you don’t go?

Tough decision there. Good Luck

As far as the wedding goes, I think that’s entirely up to you. It’s a very personal decision. If you really want to go and have the money to go and are excited about going, then do it. Don’t give it a second thought.

I likewise think that the factors pointing to “no” are solid and sound. A wedding is not a good venue to socialize with the bride, and you’d be much better served meeting her another time, when you’ve saved up some more and when she’ll actually have time to sit and chat.

So, don’t beat yourself up over it. Consider and weigh the practical factors, but don’t allow yourself to think that not going is any indication of a lesser perception of your friendship, or vice versa. Because it’s not. Besides, the care and attention you’ve been showing her, plus the love you’re putting into her gift, are far greater indicators of your friendship than whether or not you book a ticket to ND.

If you don’t want to go because it’s too big of an expense and you don’t know her well enough, I would weigh that out. But I think that categorizing the people in your life according to location and how you met, and saying that they’re valid or invalid on that basis you might run the risk of leaving people out of your life based on where they are in the country instead of on where they are in life.

I also think that we, in general, like to feel like we’re really special and being really cutting edge and cool in what we’re doing (ie- blogging, skyping) but the reality is that people, and women in particular, have always done this kind of thing. We’re all just modern day pen pals, and there’s nothing strange or insincere about that relationship.

walk: that’s awesome, too. it sucks that she has to deal with all of that, but the prize thing? priceless. absolutely priceless. i can tell you that if i was there, i would have TOTALLY registered for the sexy prizes too. in fact, i can’t wait for the stories. because i’m sure that, in true tabitha style, they’ll be hilarious.

fly: as hard as this is, i’m declining comment here. i know what you mean. i know what you’re saying and what you’re not saying. it’s all part of the thinking-through-this-really-big-decision process. whatever happens, though, i hope that you and joe are on the same page.