Copy. Paste. Post.
I wanted to write a beautiful, poetic post about how I ran a mile in 11 and a half minutes last night, and how amazing that felt, but this day has been crazy and is going to continue to be crazy until I get all the crap done that needs to be done. So I’m copping out and re-posting something. Except it’s something that hasn’t been posted HERE yet, because it’s the piece I wrote as a guest post on LovelyAnomaly‘s blog.
I figured a lot of my regular readers might not have gotten to see it, and it’s a post I thought was kind of good. Maybe it will inspire some thoughts, or something. So here we go with the recycled post. Happy Friday!
***
First things first.
I, like 98% of the 20-something population, have no idea what I want to do with my life. Nevermind the fact that I spent a hundred grand on four years at a private university studying English with the intent to go straight into a teaching credential and Master’s program. It was never what I wanted, but I didn’t allow myself to figure that out until two weeks into said credential program when I realized I HATED it.
So, yeah, I often catch myself feeling like a big loser for wasting so much money and having nothing to show for it. I mean look at me. I’m working as an administrative assistant, where all the other people doing the same job as me are high-school-educated at best, and they make more money than I do. Let’s face it, I’m better than these other admins, and I should be DOING something better.
(Wow, that sounded kind of mean. I’m a really nice person, I promise! Read my blog!)
But the problem is, I don’t know what that “something better” is, or should be, or can be, or whatever. Which is why I’m still here.
Today, though, something happened. And it’s something that made me think, if only for a moment, “I can and WILL do amazing things.” Do you want to know what happened?
I looked to my left.
I know, major revelation, right? Okay, so that’s not the big thing. Here’s the set-up.
I was sitting at my desk at work, doing a mundane and repetitive task (as usual) which involved looking from my computer screen down to a stack of paper which was to the left of my keyboard, back and forth, entering data. See, in this job, I’m always either looking down at the stuff on the surface of my desk, or straight ahead at the screen. The very few photos and pretty things I’ve tacked up on the miniscule amount of “wall” in my cubicle are rarely ever acknowledged by my eyes. So today, when I happened to look to my left — and NOT down — I saw it.
Fantastic, right?
Except my next thought was, “So…what’s my dream? What do I want?”
*chirp chirp* (That’s the sound of electronic crickets, symbolizing the very apparent LACK of an answer to those questions.)
People, this is the endless circle that is Tabitha’s Career-Path Contemplations. It’s ridiculous.
But I will hold onto this little fortune, because maybe, just maybe, the act of remembering on a daily basis that I CAN do anything will help me to start discovering what I want and dream of doing.
And maybe that’s all this whole search for purpose is about: knowing that the possibilities are endless.
Isn’t it great when you get signs like these? They assure you that everything will be quite alright even when we have no idea where we are headed.. I am excited to see where you will be led!
Best,
Hannah Katy
Life is all lessons Tabitha. That powerful lesson you have stumbled on the wall of your cubicle is powerful. I believe that one day, our dreams and want will manifest in our minds. And when they do, you have all what it needs to make it possible. Just open you eyes and be aware, you’ll discover something.
I love when the universe gives you signs like this! I read an incredible book about what steps you should make in order to realise your biggest dreams, I think you’d really enjoy it – it’s called “Put Your Dream to the Test” by John Maxwell and honestly? Changed my life
But, I want to hear about the ELEVEN MINUTE MILE! That’s quite the accomplishment and you’re clearly proud. C’mon, out with the story! =)
Psh, I have no idea what I want either. And I’m not quite sure how to figure it out. What I do know is that we have to listen to our heart, trust our head and do what we think is best and what WE need to do. Doesn’t help much, though
it’ll be awesome once you find it. TRUST ME. and honestly, it’ll probably chuck norris kick you in the face at like… 2 am. and you’ll realize it. and life will be perfect….
ok. probably not. but really, i know that you will find it one day and you’ll realize that even though your degree is completely worthless, it TAUGHT you something. it made you READY for whatever the next step is. and if nothing else, you spend $100 grand on something you liked (loved?) to do. and maybe that makes it just a tiny bit worth it.
i really believe, dear tabitha, that you are destined for GREAT things. you will do something that will change the world – even if it’s just having babies. somehow, though, i don’t think that will be it. i think you’re going to do something amazing. i can just feel it.