*Suddenly I really want a Tootsie Roll pop.

I think part of the reason I’ve slacked on blogging lately is because I haven’t felt like sticking to my little daily themed posts like “Tales on Tuesday” and all that. How did I manage to trap myself into this feeling of obligation to those things, when I’m the one who controls this blog? I don’t have to write strictly TMI stuff on Thursdays, or haikus on Fridays. I can write whatever I darn well please.

I almost started over.

Well, I started to start over. I thought about moving my blog over to wordpress.com. I created an account and everything. But I haven’t decided whether I want to make that move just yet. I think the advantages would be pretty great. WordPress gives the option to password-protect individual posts…which would enable me to say more of what’s on my mind on those rare occasions when I’m not quite willing to share it with everyone who I know is reading this. Or it would also allow me to better “censor” some of my REALLY TMI stuff, so I don’t scare off my future in-laws or potentially impressionable youngsters.

Anyway, I think I’m mostly feeling overwhelmed. What’s funny, though, is that writing is what helps me to unwind. To process. To catch a momentary break from all the hustle and bustle, planning, stressing, and just sit and have a conversation with myself.

(Er…not in a crazy, I’m-talking-to-myself kind of way…you know. A sane-type of conversation.

None of this:

Me: How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll pop?
Myself: Good question. Let’s try it out.
I: I only made it to 147 before I bit it.* I’m sorry, guys! I’ve failed you!
No…I don’t ever have conversations like that with myself…)

So, back to my point. Why is it that, when I most need to sit and reflect and just WRITE, I can never seem to make the time to do it? I’ve posted like three times in the last two weeks. Pa-the-tic.

Basically, while I know I totally warned you guys that I might become a little sparse here, what with all the wedding plans and stuff, I never really intended to let that happen. It was more of a buffer, or something, ya know?

All that said, I’m still around. And I’ve somehow managed to keep up with my Google Reader (for the most part), in spite of sucking at contributing to any of YOURS. Not that there are more than, like, ten people outside my immediate family who are officially subscribed to my blog.

But I have hopes.

And that’s why I’m sitting here blabbing about how I am inadvertently more obsessed with the whole social/public/reader-driven aspect of blogging than I care to admit. I do it for me. But I also do it for you. And I’m sad that I’m not doing it better. Alas…preparing for a life with my future husband is a tad (okay, a LOT) more important than keeping a very teeny weeny amount of blog readers satisfied.

So stick around, because I’m still here. And I’ll probably still throw up a Tale or a TMI or a Haiku when I can (slash when I feel like it), and I’ll definitely still pop in with random thoughts and silly anecdotes and stuff. And I’ll try not to be one of those bloggers who only writes about how they suck (or rule) at blogging. Cuz I know how annoying that can get…